How To Get From Where You Are To Where You Want To Be - Without Self-Destructing
There’s a phenomenon that occurs when you make the committed decision to answer the burning desire inside of you that refuses to be quieted. It is daunting, and anyone that you look up to saying that they haven’t experienced frustration, anger, doubt and the temptation to turn their back on their dream is a liar. This unpleasant onslaught of emotion lies in the fundamental discomfort of going through a transition (often more than one when we are stepping into our purpose).
It’s no secret that transition is challenging, whether it’s a move, career change or relationship. Even when we want it, change is required both from within and without to get through to the other side. I have first hand experience of failing through transition and I know all too well the enemies of emerging victorious with my desired accomplishments in place.
Those enemies include, but are not limited to:
- Self doubt: Those voices inside of you that said “do it! You got this!” will also turn on you at multiple points and ask you: “What are you thinking? Go get a real job, you hippie!” It’s rude, I know.
Anxiety: Uncertainty is inherent in change, especially when deep-diving into the unknown.
Shut-down: I have failed at building businesses before because I’ve gotten overwhelmed by the weight of my ambition and just turned it off. (That has its own consequences that show up in mental health issues, but that’s for another time.)
Because I have failed multiple times, and because I know my self-generated enemies well, I can also share with you what it takes to keep going through the transition without losing your mind (as I move like a steam train toward my dream and through my own transition).
"Those voices are the hardest part." ~Mark Clifford, my brother and super-music creator.
Here’s how to make massive, beautiful, grand changes to your life without imploding:
Find or create your tribe. This time around, I created what is called a mastermind. This is a group of people who have similar core values as you do, are willing to meet at regular intervals and hold each other accountable. My group has five core members who want to either change the course of their careers, uplevel their current career and want to really make a difference in the lives of the people that they serve through their work. We meet once a week and they have been a God-send.
Do not neglect your health. Yes, a successful creative career takes a lot of work. In the past, I have gone down the rabbit hole of the internet and before I know it, twelve hours have gone by, I’ve done a lot of busy work, but have accomplished nothing of real value and I stink from lack of showering, not because I took the time to go to the gym. My sleep started to suffer, my creativity took a nose dive and my energy was bla. Sound like a coach you want to hire? I didn’t think so. And speaking of busy….
Busy-ness is b.s.: Do not get stuck in the trap of being busy. Turn off your email notifications, and do what you can to get into deep creativity and concentration. If you have to put your phone in another room, do it. I’ve wasted too many days optimizing social media accounts, checking settings on my back end and starting five different projects just to get nothing of substance done. Social media, back end systems and projects are important, but make time to get lost in deep concentration. A great way to manage all of the demands that come at creative entrepreneurs is to start getting to know your body’s clock. I feel most creative at a certain time of day and that’s when I turn off all my notifications. During the afternoon when my mind is a little more spent, I do the more tactical stuff: social media, email and any other time suck that could keep me from what I love doing the most: helping my clients and writing. In the evening when I need to reward myself, I go to the gym or to yoga. (Bonus: don’t believe the hype of multi-tasking; that is not a “skill” that should be rewarded or heralded in most creative endeavors.)
I’ve actually left out a huge part of transitioning gracefully, and because of its significance, I’m going to dedicate an entire post to it next week.
I’ll give you a hint though: the magic of language has the power to make the most beautiful moments mundane, and the mundane extraordinary.
In the comments below, let me know which of these tips you find most helpful and what you could use more help with personally. Speaking of help, I’m currently accepting appointments from creatives and entrepreneurs who are interested in having someone there to help with their big, awesome, beautiful dreams. I’m offering free calls starting after March 17th. You can get started on the process by clicking the button.
Until then, dream so big that those who don't hustle worry about you.